Of days and nights of old

These hands are not worthy.
These eyes are not gracious enough to glance at the presence of grace itself.
This mind is too rigid. Too hard to manoeuvre imagination through overwrought tunnels of thought.
Trapped by the bars of self gratitude, these freezing walls close in to numb even the warmest of hearts.
I have not chosen this path.
This hollowness eats me.
So hollow i have become until i hear the echo of my heartbeat as it fights, claws to tear past my eardrums like slaves tunneling from missisipi to try and unearth a radiant future ahead.
Sunlight...
This hollowness gnaws beyond my flesh and disecting the marrow of my soul.
It taunts me.
It sparks my emotions like ciggarette burners and slowly separates the actions of my mind from those of my heart like chaff from grain.
Nursed to the rythm of pain, i knew the milk from the breasts of the world was poison and i had my immeasurable share.
My fingers know not what is real anymore.
I stroke the wind, trap emotions in my palm but the feel of the skin of a truthful woman evade me.
Truthful love evades me.
My fingers have stopped believing.
I knew what truth once tasted like. It tasted like freedom.
I knew how freedom tasted as i had tasted all other things this world paraded and they all tasted the same, until i tasted love.
Love felt like the clouds.
Beautiful and free but with the turn of an emotion, this...love, tore off its tumultuous mask to turn dark and savage.
How then is the taste of true love? How fresh shall its feel be compared to.
Is it as grave as those who fell by its kiss proclaim?
Is it as eloquent as distant authours and suitors profess? What then can i say of my feeble soul and heart as they stare sitting by the window of nostalgia.
This hollowness is a cancer that eats all emotion.
I have not chosen this path.
Love seems to turn the other cheek with a glance at my truth.
Can we say then that love and truth can not coincide?
Like poles of the soul?
I am at awe.
This hollowness eats me.

My sweet new jerusalem

By heavens gates we rest our souls,tired from mortal life.By heavens gates we rest.Yonder we gazed as the horizon of our new jerusalem dawned,pathways crowned in heavenly gold,paved with rubies and sapphires.Barefoot by the shores of the sea of heaven,with the soft sand kissing my feet.Bathed in audacious beauty,almost to a blinding effect.Caressed by the warm winds as we relax to the sounds of the harp of David.Inevitably relaxed i feel.I breathe easy,i rest easy,i live easy.The skies give way,as if to give a bow.They beckon me home,they demand my joining themReluctantly it all begins to fade,slowly,the relaxation turns to distress,the breaths become more shaky,The harps of David cease and the skies swallow me.My sad state of helplesness dwindles,and reality finally sets in.I find myself in an oasis of confusion,sinking in shallow waters,blinding beauty banished,exchanged for stinging horryfing hallucinations.I wake up,and find myself watching helplessly,as what i felt completed me,evaded me once more.You walked away,and called me back to reality.Reality that our mortal life is not paved with rubbies,sapphires,diamonds and gold,but with smiles,giggles,holding of hands and eye kisses,with frowns made to look the other way,with tears wiped,not just by hand but by heart.I realised too late,that these are what mattered,i realised too late that it was not just the horizon of new jerusalem that captured me,but better yet that you were my new jerusalem in your audacious beauty,and it was you that blinded me.Now as the music stops and the sun permanently sets,leaving night to haunt,i lay watching,as my new jerusalem slips away,beyond my reach,never to be grasped again.

My sweet new jerusalem

By heavens gates we rest our souls,tired from mortal life.By heavens gates we rest.Yonder we gazed as the horizon of our new jerusalem dawned,pathways crowned in heavenly gold,paved with rubies and sapphires.Barefoot by the shores of the sea of heaven,with the soft sand kissing my feet.Bathed in audacious beauty,almost to a blinding effect.Caressed by the warm winds as we relax to the sounds of the harp of David.Inevitably relaxed i feel.I breathe easy,i rest easy,i live easy.The skies give way,as if to give a bow.They beckon me home,they demand my joining themReluctantly it all begins to fade,slowly,the relaxation turns to distress,the breaths become more shaky,The harps of David cease and the skies swallow me.My sad state of helplesness dwindles,and reality finally sets in.I find myself in an oasis of confusion,sinking in shallow waters,blinding beauty banished,exchanged for stinging horryfing hallucinations.I wake up,and find myself watching helplessly,as what i felt completed me,evaded me once more.You walked away,and called me back to reality.Reality that our mortal life is not paved with rubbies,sapphires,diamonds and gold,but with smiles,giggles,holding of hands and eye kisses,with frowns made to look the other way,with tears wiped,not just by hand but by heart.I realised too late,that these are what mattered,i realised too late that it was not just the horizon of new jerusalem that captured me,but better yet that you were my new jerusalem in your audacious beauty,and it was you that blinded me.Now as the music stops and the sun permanently sets,leaving night to haunt,i lay watching,as my new jerusalem slips away,beyond my reach,never to be grasped again.

Finally i succumb

The acidic taste that made my temple its home is gone,gone and replaced with sweet honey like enticment,a hard to resist feeling,a situation unearthed by her.without words even spoken,i understand what she says.she dances to the tune of silence as no song can speak as loudly as her grace.no poem strong enough for competition,no symphony as perfectly synchronised as the smile and gaze she works with ease.you whose will is stronger than the force of gravity and transforms hearts of stone to ones full of clarity,i succumb to your thought.you are ruler of the kingdom of i...i built an edifice around my soul as i was afraid,but how did you manage to breach my defenses and destroy the motion sensors of my dull world?my heart beats to the rythm of your movement.when you melodiously spoke,twas as though you were speaking in 7 different languages,languages governed by love.and as you endevoured to surpass my intellect with words,your verbal artistry found new residence in my ear.you keep banging on my heart like a xylophone,turning and twisting then leaving me to play to your pleasure,just like a gramophone.it has suddenly overecome that i no longer see you in the physical,but as a trillion mollecules of light,similar to that that led the 3 wisemen to the stable of salvation.u make me reach that highest most coveted peak faster than eloquent words could be said by martin luther.that feeling so exuberant that mere hapiness bows on its altar is what u clothe me in,that feeling is what i keep on feeling around you...that feeling i could never quite understand,while basking in the illumination of your perfection.